q: Hey, Liz! How's it going?
a: um, seriously? are you seriously asking me this? Look at me. How do you think it's going?
q: Oh! So, uh ... I guess that means you're in some pain.
a: Some pain. Right. Sure. Yes. Some. We'll go with that.
q: Well, how much longer til the baby comes?
a:
q:Oh, hey, that's getting close! Really close!
a: ha ha ha, SAYS YOU.
q: Well, at least you know your Doctor will induce you when your date gets close.
a: Right. Which makes me think I'll probably end up overdue. Thank you for the most uncomforting thing you could possibly say to me.
q: Listen, your bitter and sarcastic attitude are unbecoming in an expectant mother and kind of making me uncomfortable. Do you think you could ... relax, or something?
a: no.
q: Oh. Well, just an idea. I thought maybe less whining would help you cope with these last weeks.
a: Maybe less whining would help you cope with your stupid ugly face.
q: ... That was hurtful. And unnecessary.
a: Sorry. I have a lot of hormonally-induced hostility. Your face is not at all stupid or ugly. I didn't mean it.
q: Have you sought the help of a mental care professional?
a: Have you sought the help of a qualified plastic surgeon? woops! There I go again! Sorry!
q: I think I'd like to leave. uh, Do you mind if I leave?
a: no, I don't mind. It's easier to wallow in self-pity if you're alone.
q: Ok. Um, well ... bye then!
a: Yes, bye! Let's do this again sometime!
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7 comments:
was that a conversation between the good and evil sides of your personality?
yes, i've met them both.
it reminds me of the conversations i have with myself. there's nothing wrong with having more than one personality. it's healthy.
considering this is baby 3 in a relativly short period of time, I say you get to express all the bitterness and sarcasim you want.
Remember how I want to call you but I can't because I don't have your phone number? And remember how I sent you a message... or two... maybe three(?) asking you for it but you still haven't sent me a message back leading me to believe that you're deliberately not sending me your phone number as part of your one step program to phase me out? Maybe it even has a name. Maybe "Edge out Em '08" or "Emancipate from Em." And why? Is it because I don't shower regularly? Or because I pick my teeth with a protractor I used in high school? What you want to leave me???
how did you find out about "e.o.e.'08"?
I like eradicate the em, or eliminate the em.
funny!
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